PERSONALITY TYPES

THE COLLABORATOR

Scores of colleges and universities across the country are shelving the trays in hopes of conserving water, cutting food waste, softening the ambience and saving money. Some even believe trayless cafeterias could help avoid the dreaded “freshman 15” — the number of pounds supposedly gained in the first year on campus (and on all-you-can-eat meal plans). “I like not having to carry a tray around,” said Peter McInerney, a freshman here at Skidmore College, as he grabbed a midafternoon snack of an egg sandwich, pancakes and apple juice. “It makes it feel like this is less of a machine just spitting food out. It’s still not home, but it feels more homey without the tray.”

THE GUY WHO'S MAKING A BUCK OFF THE "TREND"

The Sustainable Endowments Institute, a research organization that tracks environmental practices at the 300 colleges and universities with the largest endowments, said that 126 of them had curtailed use of trays, some of them banishing trays only from certain dining halls, and some introducing, for example, “trayless Tuesdays.” Such moves are often part of a larger push to embrace environmentalism that includes hiring sustainability coordinators, introducing solar panels, composting dining-hall waste and encouraging students to turn off lights with catchy sayings like “Do It in the Dark.”

"The trend has definitely taken off," said Mark Orlowski, executive director of the institute, which this fall plans to add a question about trayless cafeterias to an annual survey that includes other dining-related topics like vegan entrees, biodegradable containers and community gardens. “It reduces not just waste, but energy and water consumption. Over all, it’s been very successful.”

ANOTHER ONE WITH A VESTED INTEREST, WITH THE ANNOYING TENDENCY TO USE THE SECOND PERSON TO DESCRIBE HER OWN BEHAVIOR, AND WITH A SILLY CLAIM TO BOOT

At the Rochester Institute of Technology, which stopped using trays last summer, the manager of the Grace Watson Dining Hall, one of five on campus, said she had seen a marked drop in food waste, estimating that the school saved 10 percent on food spending despite rising ingredient costs.

“With the trays, you come in and often your eyes are bigger than your stomach,” said the manager, Janet Olivieri, who frequently eats at the dining hall and has lost 10 pounds since the change.

DOPEY, EASILY IMPRESSED STUDENTS

For the most part, when students returned in the fall, they were so dazzled by the transformation of the cafeteria that they hardly noticed the missing trays.

UNNAMED LIARS

Officials said their decision to go trayless was mainly about atmosphere...

THE NOODGE

As part of her senior honors thesis, Sarah Whateley, an environmental studies major, conducted a research project to demonstrate how much food was still wasted in the dining hall. She asked students to scrape their leftovers into plastic bins over two days, yielding 330 pounds of food on a Sunday and 403 pounds on a Monday. The food services staff then illustrated that quantity by stacking the equivalent weight in boxes of rice in the entrance of the dining hall.

“People were really surprised,” she said. “Entire sandwiches were being thrown out, and a whole slice of pizza.”

THE ELITIST SNOB

Dr. Spina, of the college food service association, cited another benefit: “preparation for the cocktail-party circuit” by having to balance dishware and cutlery. “You eventually have to learn how to hold your hors d’oeuvre and cocktail in one hand while making animated conversation with the other,” he said, “so it’s a life lesson.”

I hope they don't mind that I practically reprinted the whole piece of nonsense...